What's big in your life?

Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

To be a good writer, you should be a lover of literature. I think one of my high school English teachers told me that. So I've also been reading Max Lucado's Traveling Light. (see yesterday's blog) It is about the Promise of Psalm 23.

David being the writer of Psalms, "....is concerned that you and I don't make the same mistake with God. His pen has scarcely touched papyrus, and he's urging us to avoid gods of our own making. With his very first words in this psalm, David sets out to deliver us from the burden of a lesser deity."

The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil.
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever. (NKJV)

"Why did David write the Twenty-third Psalm? To build our trust in God...to remind us of who He is."

Study Guide questions from this chapter are profound. God is the "One who is" and the "One who causes." Why is that important? Because we need a big God. And if God is the "One who is," then He is an unchanging God. Why do we need a big God? Why do we need an unchanging God?

For me having a big God reminds me that He is in control, not me. And for Him to be unchanging is reassuring. I had written about how God has been my anchor through alot of chaos in my lifetime. Sometimes we need to hold that anchor close and allow our life (ship) to sail through the storm. Dropping anchor during a storm could actually damage the boat. I'll hold God close through the storms (& praise Him in the good times). God is definitely a big God in my life because I first allow Him to be. And He proves Himself unchanging through every step I take on this journey called life.

Father God, Thank You for always loving me no matter what I do or say or how much time I don't give You when I should. Thank You for being the God who is big and unchanging in my life. You are the reason I have anything of worth in this life either physically, spiritually, mentally, or emotionally. Thank You for the Promise of Psalm 23.

"Love is a gift that cannot be stolen"

Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

Just hung up the phone with my children. I refuse to give the horrid details of their custody situation but if you know me, you know I don't give up easily. And I'm only speaking of the custody of my younger 2 children, my oldest's custody is settled, signed, and sealed.

I've not finished the wonderful book by Erwin McManus, Soul Cravings but was reading it this afternoon.
"All of us know how cold it is outside.
Its almost unbearable out there.
Especially when we're there,
Alone,
Isolated,
Lonely.
You were never meant to be...
Alone."

"The further we move from love, the more distant God becomes. To live without God is to carry a loneliness that goes to the deepest part of our being. There's an old expression about frigid winters being cold to the bone. Without love we get cold to the bone - cold gets inside you so deep that nothing gets you warm. It's amazing how the love of just one person can make you warm again. Inside of love there is always a fire burning where we can warm our hands, our hearts, and our souls."

The love from my children has gotten me through the roughest of times in my life. (IE: leaving my ex-husband) But I've been reluctant to open up to an intimate love with another human being. I've got some great male friends whom I enjoy being in their company but to open myself up to love - frankly scares me to death. How do you get past that? Maybe when I finish reading this book it will help me understand better why I should open up to intimacy again. My relationship with my father, as I grew up, helped teach me so much about what I'm about to share with you. A father's love for his daughter can teach her so much about love and intimacy. My dad taught me great and wonderful attributes about relationships because he was/is a great dad. Our relationship was/is one of comfort and unconditional love.

Another entry from Soul Cravings is a little bit of a description as to why I shy away from companionship. "Deep down inside we know we cannot fill the vacuum within our souls by consuming people. We are not only robbing others; we are pillaging our own souls. Eventually it hits you: you cannot take love; you have to give it. Love is a gift that cannot be stolen."

It's been a while and hopefully I can keep up since I'm looking for a part time job.

Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

So I decided to jot down a few words today since it has been a month between my last blog and this one. I apologize for not blogging if you really enjoy my blog and keep up with it. Otherwise this is for my own health and entertainment. HA!

So I visited a great friend out in Colorado back in October. Lost ALL my pictures I took which broke my heart b/c it is goreous, absolutely goreous out there. If I were not attached to Tennessee b/c of my children I would move out there in a heartbeat. It is breath taking and just feels like "God's Country" out there. Anyway, I plan on staying a Tennessee gal who lives just at the edge of the state line in Memphis.

Memphis is a great place to be. I love school, have all As so far and the semster ends in about 3 1/2 weeks. I can't believe it is already time for finals. I'm excited about the classes I'm taking next semster. And once they tally everything from my official transcripts I should know my expected graduation date. Hopefully next December. Then I'm still going to go back and get my Master's Degree. Education....you get a better job with it. So I want to aim high with my future career.

So I had a pretty bad car accident on interstate 40 two weeks ago. I hydoplaned and ended up in the trees with the car flipped on the passenger side. The seat belt saved my life and there was nothing in front of, beside, or behind me when I hit the water and skidded off the road. God defintely had His hand on me! Twice something told me not to drive in that awful rain. But I had a doctor's appointment in Jackson I just had to get to. Next time, I don't plan on driving in the rain on any interstate. So I come home this weekend and was able to get another car b/c my other car was totalled. I went for almost 2 weeks without a car and it drove me nuts depending on my momma for rides to and from class. She was a sweetheart about it every time though. And we had to move during that hardship also! WOW! I've got a really great mother (most of the time - haha for those of you who actually know her you know why I'm laughing).

I did have someone ask me today how it was going with me and my mother and I honestly answered, "GREAT!". I'm wanting to change up this blog and permanently make it "The Locust Project". The life story of my mother and my relationship is a tear jerker actually. I love my mom very much and I'm so glad she is back in my life. I just hope to help others heal from estranged or never known relationships with family members and friends.

Well I need to go and get on the road back to Memphis, Tennessee. I should have my laptop fixed (yeah, it got SLAMMED in the wreck) and internet at home (YEAH!) within a couple of weeks so I'll try to stay more current with my blogspot. May you have a blessed week and God keep you safe in His arms always.